Sunday, April 17, 2011

people observation #16: Drinking my coffee black does not make me more cultured or intelligent or cowboy. It makes me a snob.

I drank too much coffee this morning. I really do feel like I am high and every attempt to remotely sit still is a struggle. Thanks Dunkin Donuts. Your hazelnut indulgence has turned me into an aholic.

I didn't drink coffee until I got to college (something about sleeping four hours a night that makes you want to unnaturally stimulate your energy level). Before college, I enjoyed it, but only if it was in some 300 calorie concoction involving chocolate and whipped cream.

But now, after simply two years of my taking part in this American daily ritual, I have become a coffee snob. I drink it straight up: hot and black, brewed to perfection, preferably fair-trade (gotta protect da workers).

[Sidenote: when I was little my mom got me into unsweetened hot/iced teas so that I didn't have to be the a-hole always need sweet'n'low or honey or lemon or milk or laxatives or whatever said a-hole requires for the enjoyment of their beverage. I guess my cut-out-the-middleman drink philosophy I've inherited from my mother carried over to my coffee principles as well That being said, my mom puts milk in her coffee. Ha, what a peasant. End sidenote. ]

I like to think that I have a little bit more of a liking from the baristas who I order coffee from. (I mean, they're not just college journalism majors with nothing to do with their degrees so they got a job at Starbucks right? I mean, they're baristas for god's sake!) They ask "room for cream?" and I say "puhhhllleeeeeez, and waste an extra six ounces of that Columbian goodness?"

[Sidenote: If you read that quote out of context you'd probably assume I was referring to another main Columbian export. Please don't think that. Sidenotewithinasidenote: I've never actually said that to a barista.]

I like to think we black drinkers have a greater respect in the coffee community. Something that the lesser people I am going to call creamies aspire to be like. As if they stare with twinkling eyes saying to each other, "wow, I want to be like her one day," while I intentionally walk by the cream and sugar table with my nose in the air. "I am just a lowly creamie," they exclaim, disappointment blanketing their faces. Soon enough creamie, soon enough.

But the truth is, not everyone cares for their coffee to be black. What I feel to be insipid, the creamie might find to be rainbows in his mouth. And what I find to be a radical reflection of my savvy time-management skills, the creamie might find to be a reflection of the never-stop attitude I call my life.

I drank my coffee this morning with a little bit of cream. It was pretty good.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

things i like.

It's raining today, and if I don't write about something positive bad things will happen. Here is a list of eleven things that I like:
1. Leaving my phone behind. Sometimes I overwhelm myself with people to call, emails to reply to, texts to respond to, appointments to make. I enjoy just forgetting about that crap for a while. I see my relationship with my phone as a love-hate relationship. Like yeah, I love the thing when it's helped me meet up with people, or call 411, or stay in contact with some of my weirdo friends who don't have facebooks, but then there's that "why-do-I-need-to-bring-this-with-me?" resentment factor towards the thing.
2. Getting high on Running. I love it so much. I love the feeling after a run. I love that there can be professionals and amateurs competing in one race. I love that I am competing against myself.
3. Sauce. It's awesome how you can change the taste of something by adding a different kind of sauce to it. nuff said.
4. Sitting. Most of my days are spent running from one place to the next. In class I'm not focused on just sitting somewhere. But at the end of a day, somewhere around 11p.m. when all my crap is complete, I like to do nothing but sit. I try not to think about much. I try to not have any tasks at hand, not even the TV on. Just sit.
5. Progress. I enjoy keeping a journal of where I am in most everything. I have one for my workouts; it's fun to go back six months ago and see how I've progressed. I have a journal for my daily life; it's even more fun to go back and look all of the
mountains I was making out of mole hills and where I've come since then. My liking of progress also applies to society, and while I take time everyday to make sure I've made a difference in this matter, I have lately found myself somewhat pessimistic.
6. Pretending I'm asleep. Every time my roommate walks into the room I pretend I'm asleep. Okay, half of the time my roommate walks into the room I pretend I'm asleep. The other half of the time I actually am asleep. But it's funny. Most of the time I will be at my desk doing something unproductive and I'll hear her key in the door then just pretend like I fell asleep doing work. When I went to my parents' a few weekends ago we had decided to start eating our dinner before my brother because we weren't sure when he'd be arriving. While eating our meals we heard the garage door going up and my parents joined in on my game. Brother walked in the door to his family face down on the table; I think I may have made a heavy breathing sound for an even more realistic effect.
7. Pop culture references. I have a family that values a knowledge of what is currently going on in the world-politically, socially, in literature, in sports, in entertainment- as well as the history of these things. I guess when you're in a family of television producers and writers, as well as educated sports watchers, something is bound to rub off on you.
8. Waking up early. It is amazing the amount of work accomplished when I actually work up the balls to drag myself out of bed. It is quite gratifying.
9. Direct deposit. What a great feeling to check your bank account and there was money magically placed there over night. Don't tell me how it works. You can't. It's just magic.
10. Screaming out my window and hiding. A phenomenon begun last October. It started when OU's unnecessarily legitimate game of Humans vs. Zombies (grown up Nerf wars) began to bother me when I'd get cut off by a paranoid Human running to class. I'm not sure how the game works exactly, but I am sure that I don't like it. Sorry readers who play. Anyways, the Human would walk passed by my window like a dweeb and it took no thought for me to scream ZOMBIE! out at the top of my lungs, only to see their hilarious reaction of assuming the position to shoot. I enjoyed this individual's reaction so much, I proceeded to scream out my window on any old day, crouch down and peek out to see who would try to figure out the source of the noise. Who's the dweeb now, I guess.
11. Dogs. What is not to like? hair? drool? Screw it. Those things are worth the undeniable friendship and impact that my dogs have had on my personality and well-being, even if it means coming home to a couple surprises every one in a while. The feeling of coming home to someone who is authentically excited to see you everyday is one that pwns any drink out of the toilet or chewed up left Sperry.